boys

My boys watching the Super Bowl together. Notice how they have a pink blanket on them. Haha!

My little cutie cutes! Eli at 3 months old.

Psalm 103

He's so "kissable...huggable...lovable...unbelievable!"

I laid him down and went to get some of his toys,

and came back to find him asleep. I was gone less than a minute. I then looked at the clock and saw it was his nap time. He's like clockwork!

Selah likes to lay next to Eli and say, "Eli's holding my hand!" or "Eli's so little!"

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I feel as though I have been in a slump lately, and am finally coming out of it. I struggle with change and there have been a few major changes that have happened to us these past few months. The first change, albeit an exciting one, came with the birth of our son, Eli. He is now almost three months old and just melts my heart each day. After he was born I had a long recovery, and I was okay with that. I had a C-section with Selah too so I knew what to expect. Just as my body was feeling somewhat normal again Dan took me to the ER (Thursday). This was 3 weeks ago. I was in the WORST pain I have ever felt! It was horrendous, and I have a pretty high tolerance for pain. Test after test was ran, and finally my wonderful OB/GYN, Dr. Kean, had a suspicion that it was my appendix. This was not a medical issue that she normally diagnoses, yet the doctors who specialize in internal medicine could not figure out what was wrong with me. Hmmm... Anyways, I am thankful that she took the time to come see me. To back up a bit, the only reason she was summoned was because they thought it was a uterine infection. Okay moving on...she ordered a CT scan, called the general surgeon, and five hours later I was in surgery (Friday night). My appendix had burst and they also found an infection in my pelvic region. Apparently my abdomen was full of this evil pussy infection. My milk also stopped coming in, because my body was going into defense mode. Eli stayed with us in the hospital those few days, but we had to give him formula for about two days until my body decided to produce milk again. The lactation consultant was great in helping us figure that problem out. Since that surgery I have had to go through the recovery process again, and that is when being immobile or limited in certain aspects to mobility were beginning to bother me. I had to rely on others a great deal more than after the C-section, and I was not accustomed to this. It has been quite the humbling experience. Through this health issue I have had a huge amount of help from our family and friends at church. My dear friend, Elaine, deserves an incredible amount of praise and thank you's. Words cannot convey how appreciative I am of her help. She brought us food (along with other folks from church :D), did our laundry (despite the awkwardness of folding Dan's underwear :p), cleaned our house, chauffeured me to my doctor's appointments, and is helping us look for a place to live (which I will get to in a bit). I consider her a super-mommy, as she did all that and took care of her own household with 4 kids. Yikes! Jenni has also been a huge help taking care of the kiddos. The little energy I had was no match for the vast amount of energy my darling daughter has. Thank you ladies for your friendship, support, and help.

Another big change is that I am graduating in two weeks. All I have to do is attend two more classes and write my final paper. I am excited...thrilled...leaping for joy!!! It has also hit me recently that that part of my life is over. Sure, I might go back to earn my MS, but not any time soon. From the time Dan and I were dating until now I have been in school, only to take breaks when the kids were born. We've been together 7 years, so maybe it took me 5 years! Yeah, it took me a while! Anyways, I am excited but also a bit sad. I'm sure I'll get over it quick...hehe. I mean come on...I am graduating!!!

We are also moving. Oy, has this been stressful! We are not able to buy a house at this time, so we must rent a little longer. Dan and I both are done with apartment life. We want a house, with a yard, in a quiet little neighborhood where our kids can grow up and make memories and we can have guests over. We thought about renting a house, but realized that would push us farther away from our goal of actually becoming home owners. It will happen, though, hopefully in 2-3 years. God has always provided a home for us, and this time is no different.

Through all of these big changes we still seek the Lord's hand in it all. But to be honest, for a while there I was not seeking God's guidance. That is why I was in a slump! I was so focused on the pain my body was constantly in, or the stress of moving, and completing my final class. Instead of sitting at His feet I was camped outside. Knowing I should go in, but instead I wallowed in the stress that was overcoming me. I think that we all go through seasons where we wallow in our own self-pity, but no matter what we are feeling we must choose to let the Lord in. It is easy to say the right Christian things during one of these seasons of hardship, but our robotic attempts at faith cannot be fooled for a real heart change. I had to be honest with the Lord and myself. God would much rather have us spew words of discontentment than ignore Him completely. Even then we are acknowledging we need Him. We don't even have to say much at all, but just sit at the feet of Jesus and listen for His words of comfort. So, once again I have learned to just sit, and acknowledge that I need Him. Nothing else needs to be said at that moment, but rest in His unchanging grace and place my issues in the hands of the one who created me. I am reminded of Psalm 103. I won't put it all here...so get out your Bible's.

"Bless the Lord, O my soul,

And all that is within me, bless His holy name.

Bless the Lord, O my soul,

And forget none of His benefits;

Who pardons all your iniquities,

Who heals all your diseases;

Who redeems your life from the pit,

Who crowns you with lovingkindness and compassion;

Who satisfies your years with good things.

So that your youth is renewed like the eagles."

On a lighter note, Selah is doing great with using the potty. She wears underwear all day and a night time pull up during "sleepy time." One of the incentives to sit on the potty is that mommy or daddy will play with the princess' in the doll house with her. We have it all set up in the bathroom. She just loves those princess' and often likes to take them swimming. Now normally I let her take them swimming in the sink. She stands there on her little stool and plays with them in the water. Well I slipped away for a second to go upstairs to change Eli, and she decided it would be a good time to take the princess' swimming. Since mommy wasn't around the only water source within her reach was...you guessed it, the toilet. Yes, I came down and she announced what she did with such a proud look on her face. So, twelve princess figurines were floating in the pee water (because I can't justify flushing her little tinkles every time) with wet toilet paper around them. Oh my sweet girl...*sigh*...the closer you get to 3 the more mischievous you are.

I have been blessed by two babies who like to sleep. It is so important to get them on a good schedule, as sleep is a necessity for their growth and development...and honestly, my sanity. It takes persistence and consistency, but it can happen. Eli basically put himself on a good schedule, and I just stuck with it. I've slowly moved his bedtime back these past few months and he is doing pretty well with it. Started at 11 and now we are at 8:30. He'll lay there for a bit kicking and cooing before he falls asleep. Thank you God for peaceful evenings with my husband!

Wow! That was a long post! See ya later Alligator!

Eli Daniel- 2 months old

2 months old! Wasn't I just in the hospital? It sure feels that way. Eli is such a smiley boy! He is still rolling over periodically from his tummy to his back. He loves his sister and watching her play! Selah is quite fond of him as well. Anything she does he has to do as well. Such as dancing and eating her play food. Before her and I left on our mommy-Selah outing this last Monday she gave Eli a kiss goodbye and said "I love you Eli!" Just melts my heart seeing the two of them together.

Eli's smile

My boy is smiling! I just love his gummy smile. He's such a happy boy. That is if mommy doesn't eat or drink dairy products. It's getting easier, though. I have found that I am eating healthier. Except Dan found these delightful chocolate cookies for me. Good thing they are expensive!

We had a wonderful Christmas! I'll post some pictures of our Christmas festivities later. That takes more time as I took way too many pictures again. Can't help it. I want to be able to look back and remember my babies as little ones. I can just look at a photograph and a flood of memories come back to me.

"ABEFG" song

Selah is doing so well sitting on the potty. I am so proud of her for going on it at least a few times a day. Her reward is to put stickers on her sticker chart and m & m's. Her favorite color is pink, and I found pink m & m's in which she was so excited about. Here she is singing her favorite song while on the potty.

PS: There is another new post below this one.

Pony tails and bear hats

Yay for pony tails and hair clips! My darling daughter, who loves to wrestle, play in the mud and is in love with vehicles of all sorts, is allowing me to put her hair up finally. And I think she looks pretty darn cute!

Eli wearing his new hat from daddy. Dan just had to buy it, even though Christmas is around the corner. You can't tell in this picture, but his eyes are very blue.

December happenings

Selah was in her first Christmas program at church. She really didn't know what to do, as the 2 and 3 year olds don't learn the music and choreography like the older kids. But that didn't matter, I was still proud of her. I got a little teary eyed as I watched her up there. My girl is growing up. Speaking of growing up she has shown increasing interest in using the potty. This week she has gone at least once each day on her little Dora potty seat. She doesn't even fear pooping on the potty. I attribute that to Dan teaching her to be proud of poops and toots. It really isn't very lady like when she announces that she tooted or went pooped in public, but if it makes potty training easier I can work on teaching her to be a lady later. This Christmas season is especially fun with her. The look of amazement in her eyes when she sees lights or trees never gets old. We'll be driving down the road and she announces that she sees lights on mommy or daddy's side. She has also been quite helpful in decorating. She loves to make snowflakes and snowmen, and they are spread throughout our house.
Selah continues to be a great big sister. She will come lay her head right next to Eli and talk to him, or sit and "read" to him. Selah has such a sweet disposition and great imagination.
Speaking of Eli, he is now 5 weeks old. My boy is growing like crazy. I sadly had to put all of his newborn clothes away already. But now I get to put some of the other adorable clothes that were given to us on him. Eli is more alert and attempts to "talk". I just love those little coos! He even smiled at his sister. Not a gas smile, but a conscious, you make me happy smile. Those two are going to have a great relationship with one another. Oh and something very strange happened, yet exciting. The other night I had him on his stomach and he rolled over. You might be saying, what?! That's what I thought too! I thought it was a fluke. So, I kept putting him back on his stomach and sure enough he would do it each time, and he has continued to do it since then. He's not supposed to do that yet, I know. I remember having such a hard time with Selah rolling over. Finally at 6 months she rolled over from her stomach to her back. Up until then she would cry in frustration until we rolled her ourselves.
I have had to cut out dairy in my diet. Anyone who knows me knows that I love dairy products. A tall glass of whole milk each meal, ice cream, cheese...yumm!!! My poor boy was experiencing horrible stomach pains and breaking out on his face. I had been told that he might possibly have an intolerance to lactose, which was being passed through the breast milk. By the way, nursing has improved immensely. No more pain! Anyways, after much research I decided to cut out dairy for a while. Sure enough Eli was not crying out in pain and his break outs went away. It is more difficult than I thought. I really never realized how much dairy products I consumed, thus, each meal has become a challenge. I'll do this no dairy thing for a while, and slowly reintroduce it to see if it affects him.
I have five more weeks before I return for my last class. Such a relief and at the same time bitter sweet to be graduating soon. It has been a challenge, yet a welcome one. I wish I could see a video of where I was and who I was when I started at Multnomah, compared to where I am now. I know I have grown and changed. I have gained knowledge that will not only benefit me as I enter into ministry, but also in my relationships and understanding who I am. Many people, mainly my family, struggle with understanding my purpose in graduating from college. Never mind they can't seem to remember the exact degree I have earned or what I want to do with it, but if I am not going to use it to make big bucks what's the point. Here is my response: The knowledge I have gained, the personal growth I have experienced, the relationships formed have more value to me than making money. These things will allow me to be a better mom to my children and raise them according to God's will. I will hopefully become a part of a ministry team that has one common interest, that is sharing the love of Christ and his story with children. Laying the foundation of Biblical truth and building upon their faith in Christ that will impact them for a lifetime.
I mentioned earlier that graduating would be bitter sweet. I am going to miss my peers, professors, and being in a structured environment like Multnomah's. It has also become "me time". Strange as that sounds. Wouldn't I rather go to a spa or get myself a new outfit? No, not really. Education is far more valuable to me.
To end this I asked Dan if he wanted me to report anything about him. His response, "I'm pretty cool and handsome." He's so humble. I'll give my own report in addition. He's working hard and excelling at work, despite his sleep deprivation. As always he continues to understand the changes that have gone on in me since Eli was born. The emotions are finally settling down. He can walk in the door after work and understand the kind of day I had just by the look on my face, and despite his day is ready to help me. The most iresistable quality about him is his relationship with his children. Selah completely adores him and Eli is comforted when in his arms. We still love to be in each others company more than anyone elses. Even after 6 years he is still my dream man.